14th
I’m Not in Love with Glamour’s Relationship Advice
Glamour seems to have confused itself with Cosmopolitan this month. Its “Men, Sex & Love” section is packed with the kinds of things that are usually the purview of its trashier counterpart.
It kicks off with “14 Things He Wants You to Know About His Body,” which includes little-known facts like that men enjoy receiving compliments. Thanks, Glamour, that’s going to revolutionize my relationship. Also, there’s this overstatement from the guys: 
Prostate exams (nearly) make up for the whole not-giving-birth thing—you’ll see!
Okay, I am the owner of neither a prostate nor a child, but do we really need to base relationship advice on a battle of whose biology has doomed them to more humiliating medical visits? (Also, guys, are you sure you want to turn this into a contest? Prostate exams don’t follow you home and require 18 years of financial support.)
Then there’s this charmingly titled article:
Guys, What Do You Want to Do Sexually That You’ve Never Done Before?
Good thing Glamour’s giving guys space to express their fantasies! Where else would men get to talk about threesomes?
“He Wants You Back” purports to reveal the “sweetly desperate, painfully sad” things men have done while disregarding a woman’s wish to end the relationship. Serenading her in a grocery store is kind of sweet (if you can ignore the stalker-like aspects of following your ex-girlfriend while she shops), but one of these stories veers into downright creepy.
So one night, when I was in South Carolina and she was in Delaware visiting a friend, I decided to proclaim my love to her…When I got there at 4 a.m., the front door was unlocked, so I tiptoed around to find her. [emphasis mine]
Oh, entering someone else’s home in the middle of the night without permission is so romantic! Illegal trespassing is the best way to prove your love and devotion!
Well, all this advice is potentially good for one thing: if I ever wanted to confirm my worst suspicions about men, Glamour’s stories might come in very handy.
What’s the worst love advice you’ve ever read in a magazine?
